Merry Christmas 2019 -- Our Year in Review

January
We rang in the New Year quietly at home, trying my hand at a southern crawfish boil.  We survived the Arctic Blast of 2019 and experienced lows of -35F actual temps!  We were thankful for no issues like frozen pipes or a broken furnace during the blast.

February
Chinese New Year fell on February 7 and we welcomed The Year of the Pig.  Minnesota received record snowfalls in February, nearly burying us, but we our neighbor Mark dug us out every time.  At the end of the month, the entire family flew off to an Edward Jones Travel Award Program Trip and enjoyed a week in St. Lucia.  It was Super E's first time out of the US and Quiet Tiger's too since coming home from China.  Highlights were a catamaran ride on the Caribbean and zip lining though the rain forest.

March
March was a big month for the boys.  Super C started the classroom portion of Driver's Ed and Super E went off to his first youth group weekend retreat at the end of the month.

April
We stayed home for Spring Break and didn't do anything special for the week off.  Super C finished the classroom portion of Drivers Ed and began the Behind-The-Wheel portion.  The boys and I wrapped up the bulk of our 7th year of homeschooling.  And on the 30th, Super E turned 12 years old.  He's now officially taller that me too and he loves to rub my face in that fact.

May
May brought a major household project -- having a rotting exterior French door replaced with a sliding glass door.  May ended with Quiet Tiger's 7th Gotcha Day Anniversary.  We actually celebrated a bit this year, which I immediately regretted since the celebration is too much for her to handle.

June
Over Father's Day weekend we attended our annual Edward Jones Summer Regional up on Gull Lake in Brainerd.  Jay was recognized for his work with the Region's Leadership Team as well as winning the Eagle Award and the Jim McKenzie Award.  This was probably the most enjoyable Summer Regional yet, as our RAD daughter will often try to sabotage the big weekend away.  She actually did okay this time.  We ended June with our first trip to the cabin.  Thanks to the Polar Vortex, the water on Windigo was still quite cold and we only boated and jumped in the water to say we did it, but got out quickly.

July
We celebrated Independence Day at home with my brother and my mom and stepdad who came up from Chicagoland for the long weekend.  Quiet Tiger turned 9 years old on the 22nd.  Jay and I ran off for a quick overnight to see Jimmy Buffet in concert.  Quite the craziness with all those Parrotheads!  The highlight of July was our number 1 son being accepted to Northwestern University in St. Paul for PSEO (dual enrollment)  in the fall.  Our high school junior would be taking a full course load of college classes in the fall!

August
School started early this year for the boys.  We began early because we knew the next month would be slightly choppy for our school schedule.  Super E began 7th grade.  Super C started PSEO online as a high school junior.  Jay and I celebrated our 18th wedding anniversary on the 18th.

September
This has always been a whirlwind month for us.  High highs and low lows for us this year.  First of all, Quiet Tiger began 3rd grade, returning to the charter school she attended last year.  Both boys kicked up their schedules with church youth groups again.  Super C turned 16 years old on the 16th, making it his Golden Birthday.  Sadly, he didn't get his drivers license on his big day because he hadn't met the minimum of 6 months on his learners permit.   Then sadly, quickly, albeit not necessarily unexpectedly for an old dog, we had to put our beloved American Eskimo Juneau down and send him across the Rainbow Bridge.  And late that month, Jay and I escaped together to another earned TAP trip through Edward Jones and we enjoyed 2 days in Brisbane, Australia (at our expense and choosing) followed a week with fellow "Jonesies" in Bali!  Highlights were river rafting, our own plunge pool and the amazing views of Rodney Bay!

October
My Rover.com pet sitting business slowed greatly this fall with clients passing dog care to their pre-teens, re-homing dogs, moving away, etc.  Hard to say good bye, but a lighter schedule felt good too.  Jay turned 47 on the 21st and I turned 45 on the 27th.  For Halloween, just Super E and Quiet Tiger decided to trick-or-treat.  Super C stayed in.  Quiet Tiger was BatGirl and Super E wore a "Scream" mask for Halloween this year.

November
Super C passed his drivers exam and earned his license!  Simultaneously, the old lemon of a minivan I had been driving for 9 years started acting up for me, but not our mechanic.  With a new teen driver, we decided it was not a safe, reliable car for our boy to be driving, so we replaced it with a 2008 Kia Sportage with Four Wheel Drive.  Super C loves sharing it with me but he continues to save for wheels of his own.  Thanksgiving was spent at home enjoying the quiet and a week off of school while gearing up for the busy holiday season ahead.

December
Holiday parties kept us busy early in December, both with event planning and hosting.  Jay ended the year with 7 years working for Edward Jones as well as climbing to a Level 7 Adviser.  Lucky 7's for Jay this year!  Christmas will find me busy with Rover clients who are traveling for the holiday.  But we will be home enjoying a quiet holiday in Minnesota and looking forward to 2020 adventures.

Carson (16), Ethan (12), Lauren (9)

Mack & Reese

Sending you much love and a 

very merry Christmas 

from our family to yours!

Luke 2: 8-14

So Long, Juneau, my Juneau

I've had 5 American Eskimos in my life.  I know the breed as well as any breeder and better than many veterinarians.  There is no cuter puppy on the planet than an American Eskimo.  They top among the smartest breeds.  My pack over the years included: Nikon, the family dog of my youth.  Then my first Eskie of my own, Kodi that I got in Blaine, MN when I was in college.  Jay and I later rescued crazed Cozmo when we were engaged to be married.  Then came the brothers from the same litter, Juneau and Kenai when my boys were babies.

Yesterday I held my last Eskimo, my Juneau, in my arms as he crossed over the Rainbow Bridge. 

He had a few chronic issues from bad teeth, to chronic ear infections, and lots of lumps and bumps and fatty tumors in his old age.  And he started refusing to go to the bathroom outside in the dog run.  When he gave me "the look" on Tuesday night, I knew it was time.

On Wednesday, September 18, 2019, around 4:00pm on my side deck overlooking our pond, Juneau crossed into the light over the Rainbow Bridge.

O, Juneau!  My, Juneau!  I loved you so!  You were a GREAT dog!  Go for a run now with your brother Kenai and your cousins Nikon, Kodi and Cozmo.  I hope it's snowing in Heaven, because you love nothing more than a fresh dumping of powder and cold winter temps.  And when its my turn to enter Heaven, I hope you are waiting for me at the door.  Goodbye, my boy.

I 'wuvs' ya, Juneau!

My Fixer Upper -- Ethan's Bedroom Final Reveal

Yay!  It's done!  Only 1 bedroom to go.

Here's your original before shot of Super E's room, from the day we put an offer in on the home.

Those dang trophy shelves left the week we moved in, I think.  Oh, I hated those!

Super E's room became the "dog themed room" fairly quickly with Update #1 below

Update #1 was fresh paint, a grey beige color (Grant Beige from Benjamin Moore),
gorgeous wood-look tile floors and dog themed decor.
I also made the dog crate into a nightstand with a piece of wood that I upholstered with paw print fabric.

View #2 of my first room update.
I still LOVE the silhouettes of our dogs on the small wall next to the closet!

Here's the final, much brighter, cleaner, up to date look.....

White window framing and white baseboards.

The white closet doors and main door make me so happy!

All those doors took some serious time!  And I decided to do paint them in my basement.  Heat and humidity and the general dust in a garage just don't make it a great place for painting.

I will say that the bunk bed and the dresser have their original honey oak color.  I have no intention of painting those!  I figure in another year, the boy will want a full sized bed, so at that point, this awesome bunk will maybe go to the cabin (hopefully) or to another family.  Then we can decide what to do with the dresser.

Now all I have left is:

July:  Master bathroom trim, window and door
August:  Master bedroom trim, windows and doors
September/July:  Kids bathroom trim, cabinets and doors
August:  Super E's bedroom trim, windows and doors
September:  Quiet Tiger's bedroom trim, windows and doors

I'm excited to be done but want to push on so I can start making my way downstairs to the main level of the house.  One more bedroom to go!!!!

My Fixer Upper - Upstairs Bathroom Final Reveal

Remember last fall when I was painting honey oak upstairs in the Master Bedroom?  Well, winter came, along with the Polar Vortex and with a running furnace, painting cabinetry and woodwork comes to a screeching halt because fumes are nasty and last for days.

I finished the deck this spring and while that was drying, I started on the final steps of the upstairs bathroom updates.

And to do this room, I finally had to break down and buy more primer and paint (last fall).  The master bed and bath held ZERO expenses for me (other than $2 for masking tape) because I had cans of both left over from a previous project - although I scraped the bottom of the paint can to finish those bedroom doors!

Here's your before from the day we first saw the house and submitted our offer:

Old linoleum, beige walls and honey oak galore.
Didn't look horrible, but it needed a face lift.

In the spring of last year I painted the room a light but bright green on a rainy weekend when I felt like a quick project.  It will be our only room with color on the upstairs.  Easy to change and quick to paint should we EVER [highly unlikely] decide to move from this place.

Update 1. Tile floors and light green paint.  
I liked the wall color, but didn't like how it paired

with the yellow tones of the honey oak.

The last week of September, I made an attempt to start the honey oak.  I painted the cabinet, baseboards and main door.  I hung a sheet up outside the door for privacy in the meantime.

Then the aforementioned winter halt.  Doors and drawers were stacked in my basement waiting for warmer temps to be painted outside in the garage.

But while waiting for my deck stain to cure this spring (72 hours per coat), I started on those drawers and cabinet doors out in the garage.  Now they are all done and reinstalled.

My upstairs bathroom is done!  Finally!  I hate leaving a project half undone for a mere reason of waiting on weather (ie, a running furnace).

As far as honey oak goes, I still have left:

July:  Master bathroom trim, window and door
August:  Master bedroom trim, windows and doors

September/June:  Kids bathroom trim, cabinet and door

July:  Ethan's bedroom trim, windows and doors

August:  Quiet Tiger's bedroom trim, windows and doors

The last 2 bedrooms bring me something new to paint.  Closet doors.  I fear those may take a lot more time and they will certainly require more space (they each have 2 accordion doors).  It may just take me longer than a month to get it all done.  At least we can live without closet doors for a while.

Fingers crossed!

My Fixer Upper - Deck 3.0

Ahhhhhh.  I have wanted this and worked for this for seemingly so long!  

My deck is finally refinished.

Here's what it looked like when we bought the house 4 years ago.
It has the Previous Owner's items out there.

Mr. Previous Owner did have it freshly stained for showings.  

It looked great.  But after a year, it all peeled.

Then in the Summer of 2017

my incredible mom refinished the deck 

while we were on a TAP trip.
Check out how cute Deck version 2.0 looked....

It looked so fresh and clean!  I loved it!  

But sadly, after 1 season, it too peeled.
Horribly!

Then we had to decide if it was time to just replace the deck boards 

with composite decking that would be maintenance-free.  

My thought was, if I can manage a full refinish, 

maybe I can save us the expense of all new boards.

It took me over a month thanks to a cooler and longer than normal Minnesota spring
to use a chemical stripper (temps needed to be above 65F for it to work).

After stripping, I power washed the deck and repainted the rails.  The rails were fine after my mom's paint job, but when I power washed, some paint flaked off, so it needed a full re-paint.

After power washing, I took the belt sander to the floor and 

tried to see if there was still some good wood underneath. 
If the wood is still young enough, it should, ideally, soak up the new stain and
should last for years!

 After weeks and weeks, battling cool temps and spring rains, 

plus many hours of drying time per coat of stain.....

ITS DONE!!!!!

Today Ethan and I moved furniture back in place.  

It needs flowers, but it may be too late to really enjoy that.  We'll see.

But Deck version 3.0 is ready to enjoy!

Now onto more projects in this 25 year old house!

(Coming soon in a week or 2 ... An upstairs bathroom update)

RAD Mother's Day

Need I even mention how awful this holiday is?

The schools start prepping the kids early.  "Kids, we're going to make fun gifts for your moms for Mother's Day!" 

Son of a #$%$@^#$^#%$@!

For at least a couple of weeks now, my RAD daughter has been a giant dill weed.  I have found socks with holes the size of Montana (and not on the bottom as if the sock wore out, but on the neck of the sock up by the ankles where she pulls out individual threads).  Hand washing has become a game of "let's leave the water running and see how long it is until someone notices."  I've found water trickling hours after I know the child last used the bathroom.

We have removed all sock privileges.  And believe me, I hate it!  Her feet STINK in her shoes without socks.  I'll be burning her shoes after this school year ends and forcing her to wear Crocs the rest of her live long life.

And hand washing now requires an adult by her side.  Which means, if mom is busy cooking dinner, she has to sit and wait until I am free to go turn on the water for her, or give her a pump of hand sanitizer (also to be manipulated by an adult lest she waste a half a bottle of gel because she likes the smell, the feel, the play factor).  Kill me now!

I hate this holiday!  Specifically, I hate this holiday with a RAD child.  She doesn't want to celebrate me.  She wants to hate me.  She wants to ruin my life. 

All I want is to run away on Mother's Day.  Fly me off somewhere, put me up for a couple of nights in a hotel, and let me order pizza and hot fudge sundaes, watch movies and sleep as long as I want, not having to wait on anyone, not to have a moment of hyper-vigilance over what the RAD child is up to now.  A nice long weekend of freedom for the RAD mom.  That's what I need!

Too much to ask?

RAD Holiday

Its no news that RAD kids like to destroy everything in their path.  They will try to ruin your holiday too.

This Easter, while doing our annual egg hunt on Easter morning, my daughter started in with the hurtful words. 

She was hunting eggs and said, 

"The Easter Bunny isn't very tricky."  

She didn't like my hiding places for the coveted eggs.  

But what she said next really hurt. 

She found her basket.  

"We usually get toys or something fun in our baskets."  

She was complaining her basket was filled with merely Easter candy.

Words hurt.

Don't tell me, "Oh, it's not her, it's really the RAD talking." 

Don't tell me, "She can't make you feel anything."

Words hurt.

Words of affirmation -- that's one of my love languages.  And I think the problem with having that as your love language means that the exact opposite, words of hurt, destroy all the more.

I love holidays.  I put a lot of work into them to make them special for my family.  And in 1 fell swoop, my RAD child can knock the wind out of me and ruin my holiday with 1 simple statement.

Why do I even bleeping bother?

RAD Sickness

We are at the tail end of Influenza A in our household.

As surprising as this sounds, for 6 years now, we've had 1 bout of stomach flu and minor coughs and colds from our daughter.  Nothing major like last week!  We like to call it Orphanage Immunity.  And friends, it was eye opening for this RAD mom.

I received a call from the school on a Wednesday saying Quiet Tiger had a fever and I had to go pick her up.  I was on my way to a client's house to let their dog out and couldn't reschedule, so she had to wait for me in the nurse's office for about 40 minutes.  The fever was 102 and we immediately went home for the Tylenol.

Day two and the fever spiked to 104 and QT said she had a sore throat.  I immediately thought: strep!

Day three and the fever was down to 101 and falling, so I didn't take her in.  She was feeling better.

Day four and she was fever free!  I thought our return to school would be right around the corner.

But day 5 and the fever was back up to 102, so I took her into the clinic where she tested positive for Flu A.  There was nothing to do but ride out the virus.  Yet I did get that all important note from the doctor so the school wouldn't get on my case about her missing so much school.

The fever yo yo-ed back and forth over the next week.  Sore throat, congestion and a nasty cough were also in the mix.  She was miserable and I don't blame her one bit!

Here's where the RAD really played in.  She got mad at me with every medication I gave her.  I get it.  They don't taste good.  And she felt horrible, so I just dealt with her anger.  Then at the clinic, she glared at me over the swab tests for the flu and strep.  Those aren't fun either and she'd never experienced anything like that before.  I just told her she was safe and that I trusted the doctor to know what she was doing.

Where I had the biggest issue by far was at night when I tried to put her in a hot, steamy bath to help alleviate the cough and congestion for just a little while before bed.  She normally loves the bath.  But this time she screamed bloody murder at me.  Rage!  Pure rage!  She insisted the water was too hot, despite me testing it repeatedly.  She refused to hold a hot, steamy washcloth up to her face and breathe through it.  Absolute refusal.  She never did sit in the tub.  She did the Asian squat.  And she only used the washcloth for about 2 minutes.  After that the raging stopped too and the bath did help her breathe, but what a mess is caused.

When a lot of us feel lousy, we want mom.  Moms make everything better.

Not for a RAD kid.  I saw nothing but 200% distrust in me that night.

I tell you, it makes a RAD mom feel empty, unable to offer any comfort to my child.

I'm just glad she's past the fever and now just trying to beat the cough and congestion.

RAD Travel

We just got back from a week long stay in St. Lucia.  My husband earned the trip through work and we made it a family vacation, taking all 3 kids and my mom and step-dad as well.

Now, before you start thinking that I'm whining or complaining about spending a week on a tropical island in the middle of the Caribbean in February, that's not it.  Not at all.  We had a good time and it was a blessing.  I know full well that my prayer warriors were storming Heaven's Gates with cries out to God on our behalf.  Our week away could have been so much worse, and I only attribute our lack of disaster to those very prayers that were heard by our very gracious God.

But traveling with a RAD child isn't for the faint of heart.  And that's what this post is all about.

Air Travel
UGH!  My girl could not sit and do just one thing on the airplane.  I packed 3 things to keep her occupied.  Not too many to overwhelm her, just enough to do something for a while, then switch after a while.  Nope.  I should have taken video, friends.  My daughter may have sat still in her plane seat, but gosh, she couldn't concentrate on 1 thing for more than 10 minutes.  Watching her was exhausting.  She'd take out her dot-to-dot book, work on it for 5 minutes, then put it away.  After that it was onto the in-flight games that come free on the screen on the back of the seat in front of her.  Even that didn't hold her attention for longer than 10 minutes.  She loves to read, yet she couldn't sit and read the Beverly Cleary book I packed for her.  Even a movie on the screen didn't entertain her.  She played and fidgeted with the screen, bouncing back and forth between movies, TV shows and music.  Even when told to pick one thing and leave it, she couldn't. 

I think I need to have her tested for ADD.  Seriously.

Fun Times = Scary Times
Don't mistake my girl's seemingly fun time as just that.  In fact, having that kind of fun overwhelms her.  It scares her and she takes control into her own hands.  On the first night there she pooped in her pants and told no one.  I didn't even know it until the next morning when I found the poop covered underpants hidden in her suitcase filled with clean clothes.  I wanted to catch the next plane out of there and go to my OWN tropical island and leave my family behind.  I didn't tell anyone what she did, not even my husband.  I couldn't let his earned trip be ruined.  So, I dealt with it solo and tried to mask my frustration and anger with fake smiles.  But less than 24 hours there and I was done.

On day 3 we had a company dinner.  Again, my daughter was having fun with new friends she made on the trip, but that fun spiraled out of control.  As she was running around, I noticed that the back of her skorts was wet.  She didn't sit in anything.  She wet her pants.  Again, the feeling of having fun with friends made her feel out of control, so she took control into her own hands and wet herself.  Had I not noticed, she would have gone on playing in wet pants all night.  But instead, I grabbed her by her wrist and dragged her back to our room where I made her get in the tub and wash her clothes and herself.  At home, she would have raged at me for making her clean her clothes.  At the resort, she just did it with only a little whining.

On the last night's celebration dinner, again, after a firm reminder that there were bathrooms right near the restaurant and wetting and pooping herself were not acceptable, I found her pants rather damp.  She had started to wet herself again, but she did stop.  So, that was progress.  A step in the right direction.  I guess.  But what mom has to remind her 8 year old child to stop wetting and pooping herself?  A RAD mom, that's who.

The Aftermath
But re-entry has been pretty ugly.  At school early this week, oh did she pull a few numbers!  I received a call from the school on Tuesday that my daughter didn't have a lunch.  They asked me if they should feed her from the cafeteria line.  Um, no, that account had been long since closed because of food-related issues.  Turns out, the girl ate her ENTIRE LUNCH on the bus immediately after eating a FULL BREAKFAST at home just minutes before getting on said bus.  She had to have been stuffed to the gills!  When she came home, she absolutely refused to fess up and tell me what happened.

In the midst of dealing with that, I received an email from the teacher asking me what she wants me to tell QT's classmates about her changing schools in two weeks.  EXCUSE ME????  This was a new one.  Seems the girl had told all her friends that in 2 weeks she is switching schools.  Not a chance.  I assured the teacher, who had fully believed the lies, that we have no intention of pulling her from the school whatsoever.  She, in turn, had to go ease the minds of QT's friends who were sad to hear that she'd be leaving.  Good gosh.

At home, I've had a raging, maniacally laughing, out of control child.

This will be her last trip for quite some time!