Easter Episodes

We saw some very strange behavior out of our Quiet Tiger over Easter.

My mom and stepdad visited from Chicago and we had a wonderful time seeing the sites of San Antonio, shopping for things that would turn our house into a home, spending time coloring with the kids, making a delicious Easter meal and attending church.

My Quiet Tiger adores her Grandpa Rand!

The Saturday before Easter we made a run to Costco.  It was our first visit here in San Antonio because it's not exactly in my neighborhood, but I love Costco so we went with the intention of getting our Easter ham and some good bread for dinner and some berries for the pie my mom planned to make for dessert.  L absolutely LOVED eating her way through the store at all the sample stations!  At every food item in the aisles she'd ask, "Open it?" wanting a sample of whatever yummy goodness was inside the packaging.  Not exactly the way it works, sweet one.  Costco is HEAVEN for a toddler with food issues!

1st ride in the Jeep.

We had some lunch in the food court area after we checked out, L sitting on the side of the table near my mom and stepdad across from me.  During our quick lunch my mom called a possible dirty diaper to my attention.  I grabbed L and went out to the car to change her, something I had done before on previous shopping trips elsewhere.  When L stood up in the back of the van after I checked her diaper she

F R E A K E D  O U T!

I mean a hysterical, scared, panicked, out of her little mind scream.  I've never had a panic attack myself, but I imagine that's what I was witnessing from my daughter.  I hadn't heard a cry like that since China and even that seemed less intense than what happened on Easter weekend.  I tried my best to console her as my boys joined us at the car with my mom and stepdad for the drive home.  I have no idea what set my daughter off.

Back home, I pulled into the driveway nearly at the same time as my husband coming back from the office.  He honked his horn in the driveway to be sure I saw him and didn't open my door too quickly as he pulled in next to me.  Again, my Quiet Tiger

F R E A K E D  O U T!

Later that night after church something else bothered my daughter.  We had exited the church after service and were walking over to the baptism pool where my 9 year old son was going to be baptized.  As my daughter walked along the sidewalk next to me, she had another complete

F R E A K  O U T!

This one lasted the longest and the fact that it was late and past dinnertime probably didn't help her emotions.  But what on earth was causing these episodes?  We may never know.  But something clearly triggered a sad or scary memory of something from her past.  It was the first time my mom had seen such behavior from her granddaughter and it crushed her heart to see the broken side of adoption, the loss, the sadness.

My 3 kids before Easter service at church.

Oh, to get even the slightest glimpse into the 22 months of her life before we met in China, to be able to understand where some of her daily behavior stems from, and to be able to erase the bad and replace it with the good.

It's a tough journey at times.  Is it worth it?  You tell me..........